So, I've noticed that a lot of girls are dating by the age of thirteen. Some even before that. With dating, comes some serious responsibility, including having standards. Standard literally means, "a level of quality or attainment." Putting this into dating terms, standards are the quality of person we want. Now, before you set standards for your future significant other, you must set standards of who you want to be. Because, if you don't know who you are, how can you possibly know what you want? There are three key steps in setting your personal standards for yourself.
1.) Examine your present self. You must first examine who you are at this exact moment. What are your goals in life? What are your favorite hobbies? What do you really take a stand on? How do you feel on different subjects? Learn who you are and how you feel. Get to know yourself before you even think about getting to know a guy and dating him. Learn the things you don't like about your present self, and figure out what needs to change, so that you'll meet your standards.
2.) Change your flaws. Now, acknowledge first that no one can be perfect. You will always have flaws, no matter how much you change. But, remember those things that you wanted to change when you examined yourself? Try to complete those changes before setting dating standards. It's important to be the person you feel you should be.
3.) Understand your new self. Once you are who you want to be, and you're the person you think God would want you to be, you must work at continuing to be that person. Then, you must understand the new person you are, and how this version of you feels on your previous stands and how you feel on different things now. You are basically re-examining yourself. Understand who you are and how you feel.
Once, you understand who you are and you're meeting your personal standards and God's standards, you can set your dating standards. No one can tell you what your standards should be. But, they should be high. A guy won't truly respect you if you will just date anyone. They need to work on being the person you deserve.
I would ask myself seven questions before dating a guy. Of course, there are others you should ask, but these are a few really good ones to set your standards with. The first thing you should consider is, "Does this person love God the way that I do?" That is your ultimate preference. Second should be, "Does this person respect me like I should be respected?" They shouldn't ask you to do things that you are uncomfortable with, or treat you like you aren't special, because you are special. They should respect the boundaries you set. Third should be, "Does this person have the same morals and values as me?" How can you go through a relationship with someone if they don't feel the same on important subjects as you do? Or if they have completely different morals as you, how will you decide on ethical questions with them? Fourth should be, "Will this person try to change me?" If this guy wants to change your personality and make you someone you aren't, then what's the point? They don't want you for you. Fifth, you should ask yourself, "Does this person respect adults and authority?" If they don't respect authority over them, why would they respect you? Sixth, ask yourself, "Is this person going to lead me in the right direction in my walk with God?" If that answer is a no, then they should be a no, too. Finally, ask yourself, "Can I bear to lose this person?" The hard truth is, if you date your best friend, there's always a chance you will lose that friend in the end. So, be careful in your dating decisions.
It's good to have high standards, but don't make them impossibly high. There's a difference in being selective and picky. Because, while it's smart to wait for a guy who is good for you, it's not smart to turn every guy down because they aren't perfect.
Dating is hard, and at times it can be heartbreaking. But, by setting high standards you can pick better guys for you. If a guy doesn't meet your standards, don't settle for him, just wait for a guy that does meet them.
-Lea B.
"Never apologize for having high standards. People who really want to be in your life will rise up to meet them." -Unknown
"Let's not be afraid to speak the common sense truth: you can't have high standards without good discipline." -William Hague
"Let us be about setting high standards for life, love, creativity, and wisdom. If our expectations in these areas are low, we are not likely to experience wellness. Setting high standards makes every day and every decade worth looking forward to." -Greg Anderson
“I don't settle in any other area of my life when it comes to excellence, so why should I lower my standards when it comes to boys?” -Adriana Trigiani
"I'd rather have high standards than low expectations." -Unknown
"Don't mistake my high standards and confidence as cockiness. If you want something bad enough, you can achieve it." -Matthew Lush
1.) Examine your present self. You must first examine who you are at this exact moment. What are your goals in life? What are your favorite hobbies? What do you really take a stand on? How do you feel on different subjects? Learn who you are and how you feel. Get to know yourself before you even think about getting to know a guy and dating him. Learn the things you don't like about your present self, and figure out what needs to change, so that you'll meet your standards.
2.) Change your flaws. Now, acknowledge first that no one can be perfect. You will always have flaws, no matter how much you change. But, remember those things that you wanted to change when you examined yourself? Try to complete those changes before setting dating standards. It's important to be the person you feel you should be.
3.) Understand your new self. Once you are who you want to be, and you're the person you think God would want you to be, you must work at continuing to be that person. Then, you must understand the new person you are, and how this version of you feels on your previous stands and how you feel on different things now. You are basically re-examining yourself. Understand who you are and how you feel.
Once, you understand who you are and you're meeting your personal standards and God's standards, you can set your dating standards. No one can tell you what your standards should be. But, they should be high. A guy won't truly respect you if you will just date anyone. They need to work on being the person you deserve.
I would ask myself seven questions before dating a guy. Of course, there are others you should ask, but these are a few really good ones to set your standards with. The first thing you should consider is, "Does this person love God the way that I do?" That is your ultimate preference. Second should be, "Does this person respect me like I should be respected?" They shouldn't ask you to do things that you are uncomfortable with, or treat you like you aren't special, because you are special. They should respect the boundaries you set. Third should be, "Does this person have the same morals and values as me?" How can you go through a relationship with someone if they don't feel the same on important subjects as you do? Or if they have completely different morals as you, how will you decide on ethical questions with them? Fourth should be, "Will this person try to change me?" If this guy wants to change your personality and make you someone you aren't, then what's the point? They don't want you for you. Fifth, you should ask yourself, "Does this person respect adults and authority?" If they don't respect authority over them, why would they respect you? Sixth, ask yourself, "Is this person going to lead me in the right direction in my walk with God?" If that answer is a no, then they should be a no, too. Finally, ask yourself, "Can I bear to lose this person?" The hard truth is, if you date your best friend, there's always a chance you will lose that friend in the end. So, be careful in your dating decisions.
It's good to have high standards, but don't make them impossibly high. There's a difference in being selective and picky. Because, while it's smart to wait for a guy who is good for you, it's not smart to turn every guy down because they aren't perfect.
Dating is hard, and at times it can be heartbreaking. But, by setting high standards you can pick better guys for you. If a guy doesn't meet your standards, don't settle for him, just wait for a guy that does meet them.
-Lea B.
"Never apologize for having high standards. People who really want to be in your life will rise up to meet them." -Unknown
"Let's not be afraid to speak the common sense truth: you can't have high standards without good discipline." -William Hague
"Let us be about setting high standards for life, love, creativity, and wisdom. If our expectations in these areas are low, we are not likely to experience wellness. Setting high standards makes every day and every decade worth looking forward to." -Greg Anderson
“I don't settle in any other area of my life when it comes to excellence, so why should I lower my standards when it comes to boys?” -Adriana Trigiani
"I'd rather have high standards than low expectations." -Unknown
"Don't mistake my high standards and confidence as cockiness. If you want something bad enough, you can achieve it." -Matthew Lush